Soooo Busted...(and by Taylor Swift!)

I will be the first to admit when I am wrong; this is one of those times.

As a parent, I can honestly say one of the things we worry most about is the safety of our children. And I've got news for you, it NEVER STOPS. You just cannot turn off being a parent because your eldest son is 6'3" and in grad school. I really wish my three sons would understand that.

When our children are infants, they are so vulnerable, so fragile that we cannot wait for the time when they are old enough to tell us if they don't feel well, etc. When they are toddlers, we go around child-proofing everything in sight, getting on our hands and knees to look at the world from their perspective. (How many of us still have the clips on our kitchen cabinets and drawers to keep little fingers from opening things that might be dangerous?)

Then, they are of age to attend school; to venture more and more into the world without us at their side. We tell them about Stranger Danger and how to be safe. Hey, I once staked out a pumpkin patch from across the street when one of my sons was going on his first field trip in Kingergarten. You just don't know if the teacher will supervise your child as well as you, right? We also talk to our little ones about the importance of listening and following the rules, to be respectful and courteous to others, etc.

Before you know it, they become teenagers and want to drive. After the drivers ed and the countless hours of driving with them where you instinctively find yourself slamming on imaginary brakes in front of you, gripping the edge of your seat, or tensing as it seems they are just a wee bit close to the car in the lane on your side -- they get their license. But you still are not comfortable with them out there -- maneuvering the highways and God knows what other element might be out there on the roads, especially at night. Unable to sleep, you stay up late watching old movies on TCM until they are finally safely home.

We often never tend to look at our driving habits, some of which have perhaps become slack over the years due to our experience as drivers. That was me until this past Saturday when adorable Taylor Swift hosted Saturday Night Live. Sometimes it takes someone else to help us take an objective look at ourselves and our bad driving habits.

Although this is a hysterically funny PSA skit delivered by a retainer-wearing Taylor Swift, I have to plead guilty on almost all counts at one time or another. The part with the GPS is definitely me. Sorry, I really resent that computer woman with her patronizing 'recalculating' remark.

So, friends and parents, I am posting this video of Taylor's PSA as Samantha Samuels in the hopes that through laughter we might all learn something about ourselves.

DRIVE SAFELY! (Oh, and don't forget to pause the music on the playlist!)

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus - Destined to be a Cinematic Masterpiece!

Hi Everybody,

As most of you know, I love movies -- especially quality movies that come together seemingly against all odds to make an unforgettable film that stays with you long after you've left the theatre. There is one such film I have been axiously waiting to see and, in point of fact, cannot stop watching the Official Trailer. It leaves me breathless!

I predict THE IMAGINARIUM OF DOCTOR PARNASSUS,a Sony Pictures Classics release, will be remembered as a Cinematic Masterpiece. Directed by the always creative, innovative and relentlessly determined filmmaker, Terry Gilliam, the film showcases amazing, unforgettable visuals and effects, a wonderful score, beautiful sets, stunning costumes, and of course a brilliant cast, including Christopher Plummer.

I don't know if many of you have seen the HD trailer, so I am putting it here for you. This is the film HEATH LEDGER was making when he tragically died. Just looking at the trailer and seeing him again on screen brings back the haunting reminder of the depth and range he had as an actor. It's heartbreaking to again realize he is no longer among us. But the film was not shelved and blessedly endured through the talents of JOHNNY DEPP, COLIN FARRELL and JUDE LAW. They not only stepped into Heath's role, but like true knights chivalrously donated their salary into a trust for Heath's precious daughter, Matilda.

I CANNOT wait to see this film!!! Coming to theatres this Christmas, I can think of no better holiday gift.

For more information, visit the film's official website:
http://www.THEIMAGINARIUMOFDOCTORPARNASSUS.com

IF I CAN DREAM....

I have always believed in the power of dreams; not just those you have while staring out the window in 9th grade biology class, or the flights of fancy and conflicting images that come to you while sleeping. I'm talking about the dreams that are so powerful and so persistent it seems they have always been part of your very soul. These are Life Dreams -- the hopes, aspirations or goals you have for yourself, your children, and even the world itself.

The road to achieving one's dream is not for the faint-of-heart. At times you may face what seems an insurmountable mountain, or perhaps a road paved with rain-filled potholes and obstacles at every turn. You may grow weary and doubt yourself; feel the dream is just too far out of reach and you should simply give up. Yet, it is important to realize that everything about LIFE is a journey. Perhaps these obstacles are there to test YOUR strength of purpose, your will and determination -- not to mention your resilience.

Sometimes your dream may become cloudy, perhaps change from what you thought you wanted into something you suddenly realize has been your true destiny all along. Once upon a time, my dream was to be a serious dramatic actress. As a child I loved playing make-believe and would even write little skits to perform with my siblings. Years later, I studied acting at the prestigious Lee Strasberg Institute in Los Angeles. One day I was given an opportunity to write and found that nothing could ever compare to the creative freedom and pure love I felt when writing. I also suddenly realized that the love I felt for acting really came from my love of playing make-believe as a child and 'telling stories'. It was as if a mist had lifted and I knew, "I'm a writer!"

For those of you who may be weary or doubtful on the path toward achieving your dream, I firmly believe you must believe in yourself and the power of that dream. Yet, always be open to that dream's natural evolution.

Staying focused, developing your skill and knowledge and working hard are very important. But nothing will ever happen if you do not BELIEVE in yourself and what you have to give.

Its easy to lose heart in the world today. When all you hear is bad news -- from unemployment statistics and the economy to war, natural disasters and far reaching global concerns -- it can become increasingly difficult to "believe in a better day" and DREAM. Without question, we live in uncertain times, and it doesn't help when the media keeps talking about the Mayan Calendar regarding 2012.

However, I truly believe that when everything seems lost, when you feel like you might as well just give up and give in -- THAT is when you stiffen your spine, hold fast to your dreams and BELIEVE.

Within each of us is a special gift, as powerful as the human spirit and as unique as our fingerprints. Each one of us can accomplish great things for our lives, for our children, and for the world.

It ALL starts with a Dream.

The following video is for everyone with a dream, especially Cailean. Keep believing, kiddo.

(Note: Pause the music on the blog sidebar to listen to the video.)

AKB

WILL YOU REMEMBER ME....

There is a saying in my family which originated from an ancestor in the highlands of Scotland and has been passed down from generation to generation. Although my ancestry is affiliated with several prestigious clans of Scotland, each one having their own coat of arms and 'motto' to express their proud lineage, this particular saying has always been my favorite. In times of crisis, loss, and even death, the words became a source of strength as well as a testament to the enduring bonds of family. I was raised to believe, without any shadow of doubt, that nothing can conquer the bonds of love. Like an invisible spiritual thread linking past, present, and future generations -- we were taught to believe:

"Love never dies as long as the heart remembers."

Of course, science will argue that the heart does not remember anything at all, that the brain is the guardian of our intellect, our thoughts, our memories. The human heart is nothing more than a muscle charged with pumping blood (which provides oxygen and nutrients) throughout our bodies. Scientifically, objectively,and rationally, this may be true. But for me, the heart and mind work in tandem. I cannot think of one without the other, much as I cannot think of a body existing without a soul. In fact, I have reason to believe that when the brain is incapcitated, the heart DOES remember. I have no scientific proof to substantiate this claim and recognize it could be just an emotionally idealistic, romantic viewpoint.

Yet, having witnessed this miraculous link between the heart and remembering, in a time when no other explanation was scientifically possible I am reminded of my family's motto.

Five years ago, when my mother was in the final stages of Alzheimer's, I sat alone with her in a hospital room after a massive stroke had left her partially paralyzed. The overall frailty of her physical condition predicted death was very near. The news hit hard, but I had told myself when death came it would be a blessing for her. She was not physically able to recover from the paralysis of the stroke, and she would not want to linger in a lost world where she did not remember who she was, or her own children. My mother had been the historian for our family, a font of information about the past who graced us with cherished memories passed down to her from other family members. This was a woman who cared not for materialistic things, but who treasured her family and her memories. For her, being diagnosed with Alzheimer's was the cruelest fate of all.

Like a grown up, I accepted her imminent death. After all, faith had taught me there is more than this, that her spirit would finally be free from the restraints of a locked mind and a frail body shutting down. She, my mother, would return to God. As for me, certainly her physical death could not be more painful than that fateful day when she had turned to me and said, "Who are you?"

But as I kept a vigil by her beside, death -- physical death -- became an unseen adversary much like her Alzheimer's. I was torn, wanting her to be at peace and unencumbered by what had happened to her mind and now her body, and wanting to keep my beloved mother with me as long as possible.

In Texas, it was storm season and every day it seemed we were pounded by thunder, lightning,tornado warnings, and non-stop rain. It was on one such stormy night, I opened my heart to God. I prayed for strength, for understanding, and to accept that death comes to us all. But, at the same time, the little girl in me wanted closure. If only I could have one more moment with my mom, when she would know me as her daughter and we could say our goodbyes. But that was something no longer scientifically or medically possible.

Well, there are greater powers than science and there is power in prayer. The next morning, my mother woke up and KNEW me. She smiled, called me by name. I thought she had been miraculously cured. That she didn't have Alzheimer's at all. They were wrong. They were all wrong. We talked about so many things, even though her speech was impaired by the stroke. God had not only heard my prayer, but granted me a miracle. Mom was doing so well that I decided after she went to sleep, I could actually go home and be with my husband and children for a bit. The crisis had passed. I stayed until midnight. The last thing she said to me was, "I love you so much it's not funny." Three hours later, I was wakened by a phone call and the news she had died in her sleep.

She had not been cured, but God had answered my prayer. He had given us both a gift before her death. For mom and me, THE HEART DID REMEMBER. At a time when a massive stroke has paralyzed one side of her body, and when the ravages of Alzheimer's had stripped away all vestiges of her memory and mental process, my mother REMEMBERED.

I have heard stories of how the dying sometimes rally one last time, but this was a woman who could not speak beforehand, and who had not been able to remember the past, the present, or me for a very long time. By the grace of God, I believe her "heart" HAD remembered what her mind could not and we were not only able to have closure as mother and daughter, but laugh and pray together and, best of all, tell one another how much we loved each other.

Sadly, this 'gift' is not something that most families of Alzheimer's patients receive. The road of Alzheimer's is paved with thorns, rocks, and daily heartbreak and hardship that often seems hopeless. And it is for those afflicted with Alzheimer's -- and their families -- that I write this blog.

I know what it is like to face the diagnosis of Alzheimer's, to watch the fear and trauma it causes to all concerned; to do your best to help a loved one while watching them become increasingly frightened and confused as they lose their thoughts, hopes, dreams, memories, and very essence as a vital person until (sooner or later) the body eventually can endure no more and dies.

Every 70 seconds, someone is diagnosed with Alzheimer's. Approximately 3.9 mllion people in the United States alone are living with Alzheimer's. Just as frightening, research has shown that having a parent, brother, sister or child with Alzheimer's increases your risks for the disease as well.

As a spouse or child of an Alzheimer's patient you WILL find yourself not only trying to deal with drastic (and sometimes violent) changes in a loved one's behavior, but facing necessary financial expenses not covered by insurance, Medicare or Medicaid. The emotional, physical, and financial demands of caring for a loved one afflicted with Alzheimer's can be so overwhelming that at times you do not know how much more you or your family can handle.

THAT is why the Alzheimer's Association is so important and why they need and deserve our support. The goal of the Alzheimer's Association is to "eliminate Alzheimer's disease through the advancement of research; to provide and enhance care and support for all affected; and to reduce the risk of dementia through the promotion of brain health."

This fall, the Alzheimer's Association is hosting its annual "Memory Walk". Cities and communities across the United States are coming together to not just support the Alzheimer's Association, but walk for a cure from this devastating, cruel illness. Chances are someone you know has been affected by this disease. Get your church group or school involved. Or, just walk yourself in memory of a loved one and to help raise awareness. We can ALL be the link between the heart and the mind.

Here is your chance to prove that...

"LOVE NEVER DIES AS LONG AS THE HEART REMEMBERS".

Please join or start a Memory Walk team today. For more information, visit:
http://www.alz.org/index.asp


AKB

PERSEVERANCE....

Today, while recovering from surgery, I watched some old news reel footage of London after the bombings of World War II. I had heard stories about the Blitz and what the people of England endured. I will be honest, much of what I remember from World War II was from history books or the occassional film like Mrs. Miniver. Yet, there is something to be said about watching actual film footage and how a picture is truly worth a thousand words. The above photograph of St. Paul's Cathedral (standing proudly in the London dawn after another night's bombing) is one such photo.

The photograph is so powerful -- dramatic and beautiful, evoking not just the frightening asepct of war and the devastation it wrought upon London and its people, but also the hope and faith of a new day and the promise that within each of us is the capacity to withstand trials and tribulations -- whether they are physical or social. Within the very fiber of our beings is this iron will capacity for determination and strength to greet the dawn with courage and a keen desire to persevere.

I have given a great deal of thought of late to perseverance and find it such a admirable yet often overlooked trait each of us possesses. Very much an unspoken hero, PERSEVERANCE emanates from our soul. It is a constant friend in times of despair or uncertainty. It is that little voice whispering 'you can do it'. At times we forget its importance in our lives and may even question if it is an attribute we possess to any degree. We often admire others for their courage and fail to realize that it exists in all of us, though we may not see it. After all, it is usually only when dire circumstances occur that we give it any particular attention.

Each of us prays for courage when tested by life or faced with a mountain we fear we may not be able to climb, a storm we may not be able to weather. What I have come to recognize is that courage and perseverance go hand-in-hand, prompted and strengthened by faith as well as the undeniable essence that makes us human beings. True, it is perseverance which encourages us to believe in peace over war, goodness over evil, and that light WILL conquer darkness...always. But it is also there in times of quiet introspection and day-to-day living.

The quality of perseverance is what enables a preschooler to learn how to tie their shoe. It is the steadfast spotter willing us to practice a sport until one is skilled and proficient at it. It is the silent voice of your spirit which encourages you to write that book, paint a picture, or participate in a charity run. And like those proud Brits who endured the Blitz, perseverance enabled them to work together and not only survive the ravages of war, but rebuild their beautiful and historic London. Perseverance has been with us since time began and continues to endure, sometimes against all odds. It desires nothing more than to help people achieve their potential and face challenges all over the world. Whether that challenge is the pursuit of education, a career goal, financial stability, or physical health -- we must all recognize and be grateful for its existence and guidance.

Today, I recognize its presence in my life as a benevolent blessing to the spirit of man from God, and a silent friend who has not only walked beside me during some very dark moments but encouraged me to prevail. I am thankful that as I get older, the need to persevere and face life's challenges has not diminished but become stronger. At the same time I am reminded of the saying that it isn't the destination that is important, but the journey itself. After all, there are times when despite our courage and perseverance we may not achieve the outcome we desire. Some dreams will remain elusive. Yet, the outcome should NOT diminish the effort. It is taking that first step...no matter the odds...that helps us to grow individually and collectively, to learn not only about the world but what we are capable of doing for the greater good, and to understand perserverance is truly the silent voice of God deep inside us willing us to believe in the impossible and make wondrous things happen.



AKB

Remembering Jane...

Today commemorates the 192nd anniverary of the death of Miss Jane Austen, an author whose novels are not only loved throughout the world, but considered true classics of English literature. Beginning with Pride & Prejudice (1811), this intelligent and articulate woman wrote books that transcended entertaining works of fiction about life and a desire for enduring love.

A Jane Austen novel stands apart because of her literary voice, her remarkably descriptive narrative, the crafting of her plots, and the unique and diverse characters she created -- some of whom have become iconic in the 21st century. Yet there is something about this particular author that is even more significant to those who love her work.

Jane Austen remains the voice of an era. She encapsulated through her writing not just the beauty and elegance of the Regency period, but also provided a rapier-edged honesty and insightful commentary on society itself. She showed us the strictures and customs imposed by early 19th century society -- the dynamics of family regarding such issues as financial security, inheritance, the rights (or lack thereof) of women, scandal, and even the political and military climate of the period. Her undeniable perspective as a woman living in the Regency era became, in itself, a wondrous magnifying glass into a world her readers could see and understand. This attention to detail continues to inspire writers of historical fiction regarding the importance of time period research and accuracy, and how it affects as well as enhances both story and characters.

The novels of Jane Austen are published in 45 different languages, and can be found in book stores, public and academic libraries, as well as Kindle editions. Motion picture adaptations of her novels continue to gain in popularity and have received numerous awards, beginning with the Oscar-winning 1940 version of Pride & Prejudice starring Sir Laurence Olivier and Greer Garson.

For me, as a reader and writer of historical fiction, Jane Austen has always been someone whose work I not only love but admire. As a woman and writer in the early stages of my own literary career, I cannot help but acknowledge the enormous respect I feel for this 19th century woman whose contributions to literature and the publishing industry 'as a woman' will never be forgotten.

Today, let us celebrate the brilliance of Jane Austen's accomplishments as a writer, but also remember the gentle woman whose tragic passing on this day devastated those who dearly loved her. Perhaps the words of her beloved sister, Cassandra (with Jane at the moment of her death) can best help us to remember Miss Jane Austen -- the woman as well as the author.

"I have lost a treasure, such a sister, such a friend as never can have been surpassed. She was the sun of my life, the gilder of every pleasure, the soother of every sorrow; I had not a thought concealed from her, and it is as if I had lost a part of myself. I loved her only too well — not better than she deserved, but I am conscious that my affection for her made me sometimes unjust to and negligent of others; and I can acknowledge, more than as a general principle, the justice of the Hand which has struck this blow." - Cassandra Austen, 17 July 1817

"To Sleep...perchance to dream" - Writing, The Muse and Insomnia

If you were to sit down and talk with writers, poets, sculptors, artists, and/or musicians about what inspires their work, imagination and/or creativity, its highly probable the word "muse" would come up.

For Italian Renaissance artist, Andrea Del Sarto, his wife became his muse. For him, whether objective or influenced by a great love, she embodied an ideal of womanhood that no one could ever match. As such, she not only inspired his talent, but has been immortalized as the woman in his paintings of women. A physical muse could become such an important, integral part of one's creativity and artistic vision that without it, nothing could ever be the same. It has been said that after Salvador Dali's muse and companion (Elena Diakonova) died, the surrealistic magical influence for which he was known and that dominated his work no longer existed.

For some artists, writers or poets,a physical muse might have been a transient figure in their lives. Picasso was nothing if not proliferate with a variety of female muses who inspired his work. Let's not forget how many poems Scotland's Robert Burns wrote that were inspired by women who, for whatever period of time, became the focus of not just his amorous attentions but influenced his work.

So, what exactly is a muse? According to Greek mythology, the Muses were nine goddesses (daughters of Zeus) who inspired the arts and literature. Among these goddesses, Clio was the muse for history and poetry. Thalia was the muse for comedy. The muse for dance was Terpsichore. The muse who reportedly inspired the Odyssey and the Iliad was Calliope.

Yet, it does not necessarily signify that one's artistic muse must be the embodiment of some mythological goddess or perhaps the idealistic physical image of a woman (or man for that matter). For many, including myself, a muse is that spiritual essence which speaks to your soul and inspires creativity. A poet may find a quiet, secluded spot amidst the beauty of nature to be their muse. A musician may hear a symphony of notes in the gentle whisper of the wind. Admittedly, nature often triggers inspiration for me as a writer; so does music -- particularly Celtic, Baroque classical and the songs of Medieval Baebes. However, since childhood, the most powerful creative inspiration for me has been found in dreams. Whether my Dream Muse is a vaporous Greek Goddess, mystical Celtic Goddess, ethereal Spirit Guide, or just the unencumbered subconscious of my own imagination, I have no idea. I know the voice, not the form. And I have learned NEVER to underestimate the power of dreams.

This is not to say that every dream provides inspiration for me as a writer. For example, I hardly think a recent dream featuring a very comical appearance by Robert Goulet as a maitre'd was my Dream Muse inspiring some new writing project. And unlike other dreams I have had that turned out to be more premonition-type visions or spiritual truths revealed to my subconscious, when my Dream Muse speaks -- I know it for what it is and I listen.

Images, settings, plotlines, dialogue, and even music come together like a glorious tapestry. Sometimes the entire story unfolds like a motion picture. Sometimes it is the abbreviated trailer vision, but it shows what I need to do and where I must go with the story. Writing requires discipline and dedication; however, I also believe it is the inspiration and spark of creativity that is unique to each writer's voice. That spark of inspiration or creativitiy is mysterious in itself and not something that I feel can be forced. It may be a romantic viewpoint, but I believe Einstein had it right when he said, "Imagination is greater than knowledge".

But what happens with circumstances or health factors interfere, and all attempts to adapt and/or find that creative 'muse' are compromised by something so simple as fatigue.

To quote Will Shakespeare, "To sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there's the rub..."

Like Shakespeare and other authors including Charles Dickens, Robert Burns, and F. Scott Fitzgerald, I am experiencing Insomnia. I've never had trouble sleeping before so this is very strange. I am aware this exhausting state is a side effect from medication I am taking for a severe asthmatic problem, and will subside when treatment ends. But, for the past couple weeks, I have really missed those hours of peaceful slumber.

Nighttime has become a surreal, strange existance.

Apart from knowing I need to sleep for simple physical well-being, what bothers me most is not just missing out on rest, but how lack of sleep denies the wondrous, creative influence of dreaming. Equally frustrating is when an inspirational or creative writing idea comes to mind during the day, I am either too tired or so busy to drop everything and go write. Don't gasp too loudly, but as important as writing is to me, other things may take precedence during the day.

Ironically, it has taken Insomnia to strangely sensitize me to consider and re-evaluate the process of creativity with the discipline of writing, as well as the daily battle between life's distractions and necessary focus. Often we get so caught up in our daily responsibilities, we push our wants and needs further away.

Visualize a window left open in the attic of your home. That window is your creativity. The muse is the sound of the wind coming in thru that window, biding you to heed its calling. Busy with family or work, you want to go deal with the window right then and there, but you just cannot. You're too busy...or too tired. Like an emotionally drained Scarlett O'Hara, you tell yourself -- "I'm not going to worry about it now. I'll close it later." If you're lucky, there will come a quiet moment in your otherwise hectic day where you hear the wind whistling at you and remember, "The window!"

Some may call not closing the window immediately as simple procrastination or a question of discipline. After all, I personally know many authors who are so focused, disciplined and structured about their work, they never find themselves facing the 'open window' dilemma. They get up each morning, put in hours of work and churn out pages like J.K. Rowling's fictitious Hogwarts turns out wizards. I remember Nora Roberts once saying at a conference that nothing intefered with her writing when her two sons were little. A strong, loving single mother, unless it was an emergency, her boys knew not to bother her. Today, that discipline and ability to 'write the damn book' has made her one of THE most prolific and successful authors on the planet.

Alas, I am not Nora Roberts. Yes, I could be more disciplined, but quite simply, nothing has meant more to me in my life than being a wife and mother. Family is my priority although not necessarily a practical business philosophy for a writer trying to establish her career. Let's just say in a balancing act between famly and career -- family is more important. This belief doesn't mean writing is NOT what I love or want to do. And it really irritates me when people imply 'well then, writing is a hobby for you'. No, it's work -- it's my work. But at the same time, I do NOT want to ever look back at this time in my life with a shelf of completed manuscripts (some published, some not) and have few memories of precious moments I could have spent with my family. This time comes once. As I have often told my friends and family, 'there are no rewinds in life'. Everything else, including my aspirations as an author, come after the people dear to my heart.

And so it is I find myself in a quandary of sorts. At times I feel like the tortoise left behind by energetic hares all churning out pages come Hell or high water every day. Trust me, there are so many stories I need and want to tell. Timeless stories of love. Adventures to take. Mysteries to solve. At this very moment, I have several manuscripts at various stages of development, as well as a couple screenplays. They wait for me three flights up in my writing garret.

Ironically, having Insomnia has opened my eyes to how important a structured life can be, and how one must learn to balance inspiration with discipline, as well as family with work. Not being able to sleep when you need to is strangely akin to not being able to write when you want. Over a period of time, a body without sleep will weaken and not function properly. Mind, body and spirit must work together just as inspiration, discipline and dedication are necessary to write.

Lesson learned. Soon enough, I will return to the peace and bliss of a full night's sleep where my hopes and dreams will converge. The gripping mental fatigue during the day will be replaced by energy and renewed motivation. Rather than watch daylight slowly brighten the sky from sitting up all night, I will waken rested and refreshed to see the sunrise and welcome the promise of a new day.


AKB